40 Days In The Word

So, our church started "40 Days in the Word" last week. It is basically a DVD lesson spread over 6 weeks where we meet as small groups to go over how to read/study the bible.

I'm ashamed to say that reading the bible hasn't ever been a priority with me. I've never learned how to do it, I've never developed te habit, and I've never taken the time to see if I could enjoy it.

I believe their 6 ways to study based on this "course" by Rick Warren. So far, we've learned "pronounce it" an this week we just learned "picture it".

Tonight's devotion while doing the Picture it method, I went through the newly learned steps of how to have/prepare for a quiet time (devotion)--something else I've never learned or practiced.

Step1: wait on God
I sat quietly, listen to a worship song, etc

Step2: Pray briefly
I began to pray aloud, and found myself talking and talking and then remembered that if I'm having a conversation with God, I need to listen to what He may have to say back. So I found my praying changed. I would say something and then wait, say something else and then wait. I found when I was praying like that, my prayers were more intentional, I felt very connected to my audience (if you will). Just sitting in silence made me slightly emotional as I started to feel how God felt about me.

So, I kinda ignored the briefly part, but it was awesome. I didn't watch the clock, and felt as though I could have continued for a while.

Step3: read a section of scripture....slowly
Tonight I read my assignment of Mark3:1-6. The story of the man with the shriveled up hand on the sabbath.

Step4: Meditate and memorize
I'll be honest, tonight I did not memorize 6 verses of scripture. But I did read it slowly with some verses reading and rereading a couple times.

Step5: write down what God Shows you
Luckily, we have a handbook that leads us in the right path. The questions tonight"Be the man with the shriveled hand: are you incapacitated in any part of your life" and "be the Pharisee: are you disturbed when Jesus breaks religious rules or does something out of the ordinary"

I skip the first question...I don't identify. Then I write my answer to the second. As I'm writing my answer the the second, I start thinking about the first again. I'm really trying to identify with him...but obviously still trying to play the part of "everything's okay with me". Then it hits me..yes, I do identify with him.

My shriveled hand is my overwhelming fear of rejection and abandonment. Normal days it doesn't bother me....but if a friend seems upset or quiet, I assume it is me and she doesn't like me, if Scott and I argue, I feel that he will just up and leave me...those feelings are debilitating. They hurt and they aren't rooted in te truth. They are insecurities from my childhood/past.

Step6: Have your time of prayer
So, since our workbook has two more sections where we are supposed to write down how the passage applies to us and what we will do about it and also a section where we can write our prayer, I just sat quietly after filling out those sections and listened for what God might say.

All I have to say is that the song Jesus loves me came to my thoughts. Such a simple truth, but yet so profound. He does love me, when ever I doubt if people in my life love me for me or whether they will abandon me, I need to remember that Jesus loves Me! He is for me! He has great plans for me! Don't focus on my feelings, focus on what I know....Jesus Loves ME!!!

I think tonight's devotion was awesome and now a little more than an hour later, I'm done my devotion. One more part to devotions is sharing with others what we learned. So there you have it...we are all soooo loved :)